Sunday, February 24, 2013

Friend like you

In my limited experience of being a military wife, I feel as though I am constantly learning new things and adjusting to this new lifestyle. One of the main conflicts that I have been dealing with lately is how quickly you make and lose friends in the military. So far we have only been stationed at one base, but in the year-and-a-half that I have lived here I have learned how difficult it is to maintain good friendships. It seems as though whenever I become close to someone, they either get orders to move, their enlistment is up, or they just turn out to not be the person I thought they were. I am starting to feel very lonely out here, I feel like I am back to square one again. The way it was when I first moved here, out of my element.

Luckily I have a great support system back home, but I never realized how difficult it would be to keep in touch with people, and I'm sure that most people who have moved away from home can relate. Weeks go by and I realize that I haven't even talked to my own parents, which is my own fault. The phone calls become less frequent, and I feel like I am missing out on so much. Then when I finally feel content and have created a strong group of friends in Tucson, something always happens to ruin it.

Now I love my husband more than anything, and he is my best friend, but a girl needs her girlfriends to talk to and laugh with. Especially being a military spouse, it is important to have a strong support group of other military spouses that can relate to certain aspects of you life. I am starting to feel like Paul Rudd in "I Love You Man," I need to go on a friend hunt A.S.A.P., with hopefully fewer awkward encounters. It is really getting to the point where I am becoming jealous of my own husband when he leaves to go hangout with his friends, pathetic right? He can only invite me to hangout with them so many times, and I can't expect him to not have a social life because I haven't had much luck in the friend department as of late.

Then I came across this great article from baseguide.com, Desperately Seeking Friends, and it really made me realize that I am not alone, and the only person holding myself back from making new friends is, well myself. Yes meeting new people and forcing myself out of my comfort zone is scary, and something that I have never been the greatest at, but sometimes taking risks and facing new challenges is the best way to learn and improve your life. My friend hunt still continues, but now I realize that ultimately my success is up to me. In the military moving around is inevitable, and constantly adapting to new environments is challenging. But each challenge we face just makes us all stronger, whether you realize it or not, and this journey is something that I am willing to take on one day at a time.

- Jenny

1 comment:

  1. I love this post -- and you!! -- so much. I obviously can't relate on the same level, but I definitely can relate. It's hard to make friends as you get older (definitely more awkward, ha!) but you are totally right - you get what you put in. I have actually been trying to be more sociable lately as well. I am always here for you though! Let's make a chat date for this weekend!

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